As I recall: I might want to take that back, but will Microsoft let me?

In WORD and EXCEL programs, there is a wonderful what I term "second chance" feature called "undo." Perhaps "undo" might be deemed to be the enhanced and more technologically advanced version of the self-correcting typewriter ribbons back in the day, which, at the time, were deemed to be an improvement over typewriter erasers, correction fluid, correction tape and even the erasable bond paper. "Undo" and its cousin "Redo" have been of considerable help to me over the years, and I suppose those of us for whom an electric typewriter was considered to be a vast advancement over a manual typewriter may have a greater appreciation for these features than younger people who have known nothing else. Oh, if it were possible that "undo" and "redo" could be applied with such efficiency and ease in many of our life situations! It seems that opportunities to "undo" are very limited; perhaps in some cases, a memo or note composed in haste can be retrieved without reaching the eyes of the intended recipient... or maybe in some cases it might be possible to erase or delete an audio message before it is heard. However, most of the time, once a message is relayed or a deed is done, there is no going back. Instead, one must deal with whatever consequences or results spring from our actions. In my lifetime of viewing various courtroom proceedings on Perry Mason, and other prime time dramas and daytime serials, I have been intrigued by the statement of the judge when he or she states: "The jury will disregard...." whatever the comment may have been for which an objection was made. In my estimation, there are probably only 2 people, both fictitious, who would strive and be able to comply with the order of the judge: the persona we heard and saw of Gracie Allen [of the comedy team George Burns and Gracie Allen, explained for the benefit of readers who are younger and were obviously not raised right if they do not know already] and Amelia Bedelia, a young woman featured in several children's stories and who takes all that is said both to heart and literally. Otherwise, who are these judges trying to kid? Whatever the words said were heard by the jury and more than likely permeated and penetrated their thought processes. Only one time do I remember hearing the futility of the order addressed in a program. I wish that I had more specific recall, but it could have been in a trial presented on one of the daytime serials, in which one of the characters expressed misplaced relief that the jury was instructed to disregard some damaging remark which was made, to which the defense attorney replied, "But will they?" To me, one of the saddest illustrations that many things in life cannot be fixed with an easy "undo" command is when Lucille Ball and then husband Desi Arnaz had to have that painful meeting with their children to inform them that their parents were divorcing. After breaking the news to them as gently as possible under those circumstances, a very heart tugging question was posed by their son Desi Jr. who was reported to have said "Can't you just take it all back?" I think that many of their fans around the world truly wished the same thing. Despite the fact that both individuals went on to marry other people, a part of me always wished for a "redo." Apparently for a few years afterward, both of the Arnaz children vied for a chance to "redo" as they drug their parents multiple times to the movie "The Parent Trap," in which the film children had success. For all of my preceding praise for the "undo" function, I do have a bone of contention with Microsoft Outlook about a feature which they term "message recall." The name implies that it is possible after sending an email to "take it back" via selecting the message recall option. To quote the character Gomer Pyle, "Deceitful, deceitful, deceitful!" I have had multiple frustrations with attempting to use this feature, which works only sporadically at best. Just this past week I tried to recall a message to a co-worker, only because I wanted to add a clarifying statement to the original communication. I received a "Not read" email notification, that the message was deleted without being read. But then I was directed to a website for the Message Recall Status Report, which stated that "the message was successfully recalled, but read by the recipient." Say what? How dare you, Microsoft, brag about success when you failed me in my attempt to keep the message from being read. I cannot help but believe that Gomer's reaction to this fiasco would have to be "for shame, for shame, for shame!" ••• Mike Baker is a local author.